Countdown to reaction. Three, two, one.

Nights at the subrocket are much more enjoyable when my friends show up to drink. Jen and Steve, who never come out, sat for nearly three hours at the bar and chatted with me as they slowly got drunk. They're one of the most down to earth couples that I know - completely in love but never really lovey-dovey in public. That behavior is nauseating and provokes really dirty and mean stares from me. I'm not sure it's entirely resentment, at least not now, I think it's the 'protection' or 'defense' element. Some of these men shower their new girlfriend with cutsey behavior in order to subconsciously ward off potential stronger suitors. I think this kind of display is born out of insecurity more than anything else, and only very rarely out of pure desire or affection.

Is this cynical? Am I the only one who finds this kind of behavior revolting? The little eskimo nose kisses, pinching eachothers asses, massages, and 'from behind hugs' in a bar is just uncalled for. I see it all the time and I just chuckle - my amusement turns quickly to disgust and revulsion. The college age kids who frequent the subrocket seem to be really enamoured with this type of affection towards their 'girlfriends' (and I use this term loosely).

When I got home from work I slept alone. I called ChI because I was a little drunk and we talked until about five am. I can't get her image from New York out of my head - I'm thinking now that it was a bad idea to see her. It was bad call Ripley, a bad call. First and foremost she knows how to push my buttons - a weakness of mine when it comes to women. I can't help it, as tough as I try to be I am always at the mercy of perfume and a soft touch. When we roll off the bed and she throws me to the floor - now that is when the fun starts.

Dean